Talk:Loss of biodiversity - caused and solved by globalisation?: Difference between revisions

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==3. Written Comments for Author(s)==
==3. Written Comments for Author(s)==
Hey Jules, first of all I want to thank you for your feedback, I think some ideas are really helpful and I will try to improve the text. However, I will write you a personaI message, since I don't want this to look like I was trying to waste words... I like your essay, too, especially since this is a topic I am very interested in. There are a couple of annotations concerning content and structure, I hope they will serve you. Furthermore I would like to add, that I found it extremely interesting to read your essay, there are a lot of facts in there, which I didn't know before I read your essay! Good selection of relevant and interesting facts therefore!
Hey Jule, first of all I want to thank you for your feedback, I think some ideas are really helpful and I will try to improve the text. However, I will write you a personaI message, since I don't want this to look like I was trying to waste words... I like your essay, too, especially since this is a topic I am very interested in. There are a couple of annotations concerning content and structure, I hope they will serve you. Furthermore I would like to add, that I found it extremely interesting to read your essay, there are a lot of facts in there, which I didn't know before I read your essay! Good selection of relevant and interesting facts therefore!


*Although I really like reading your text, it sometimes becomes obvious, that you had some problems in regards to the definition terms as to the final goal, which the essay should aim for. Sometimes it seems that you are unsure about your own opinion. I think what you are writing in your essay is indubitably true. So you should be more confident about what you are saying, since it is very true. Also for me, a leitmotif is missing. I had or still have my problems with that, too. Since you've got everything figured out in your mind, everything seems so obvious. Try to read your essay once again from a strangers point of view. Maybe you could lead over the different subchapters, that would make it easier to read.  
*Although I really like reading your text, it sometimes becomes obvious, that you had some problems in regards to the definition terms as to the final goal, which the essay should aim for. Sometimes it seems that you are unsure about your own opinion. I think what you are writing in your essay is indubitably true. So you should be more confident about what you are saying, since it is very true. Also for me, a leitmotif is missing. I had or still have my problems with that, too. Since you've got everything figured out in your mind, everything seems so obvious. Try to read your essay once again from a strangers point of view. Maybe you could lead over the different subchapters, that would make it easier to read.  
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