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Talk:Justifiable Risk or headless Fear? The Difference between experienced and factual Disadvantages of a Process called Globalisation: Difference between revisions
Talk:Justifiable Risk or headless Fear? The Difference between experienced and factual Disadvantages of a Process called Globalisation (view source)
Revision as of 20:48, 13 January 2010
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**When I first read your title I thought: “Wow, that could be everything”. But you solved this wide ranging theme in a fantastic way (see below). However because this theme so wide, from my point of view it is even more important for the (first) reader that the article has an logical structure the reader can realize really fast. Therefore you could maybe at the end of your introduction add a paragraph where you say what (and why) you will do in the following article to make the following logical structure clear. To emphasize this logical structure it would help if you would add small headings as well. As I sad above I think your essay is well structured, but this suggestions would make it even more pleasant to read (especially in the first time). | **When I first read your title I thought: “Wow, that could be everything”. But you solved this wide ranging theme in a fantastic way (see below). However because this theme so wide, from my point of view it is even more important for the (first) reader that the article has an logical structure the reader can realize really fast. Therefore you could maybe at the end of your introduction add a paragraph where you say what (and why) you will do in the following article to make the following logical structure clear. To emphasize this logical structure it would help if you would add small headings as well. As I sad above I think your essay is well structured, but this suggestions would make it even more pleasant to read (especially in the first time). | ||
'''Dear Jule, I think your idea of writing a small abstract about what is going to be examined in this essay is excellent. Small headings would be too small, though, I tried it before and it totally destroyed the coherence I am so concerned of. Nevertheless, I would really appreciate if you had another look on the last paragraph of the introduction. It is really short, but I think it will fulfil its purpose.''' | |||
Before I will add a few comments to your essay in terms of content I want to emphasize that I really like your style of writing: You have obviously a good vocabulary and you use this well. | Before I will add a few comments to your essay in terms of content I want to emphasize that I really like your style of writing: You have obviously a good vocabulary and you use this well. | ||
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*First of all your theme is very original and really important!!! Probably we do have different opinions in general to some aspects...But we should discuss about this in another place. | *First of all your theme is very original and really important!!! Probably we do have different opinions in general to some aspects...But we should discuss about this in another place. | ||
**One main critical point is the part with “herefore the globalisation process did not narrow any of the countries‘ chances to improve their situation”. As I understand your essay in total you plead for a more pragmatic, differentiating discussion about the risks of globalization. From my point of view in this part you did almost the same mistake: Of course you cannot say that the “bad, bad globalization” is responsible in total for the situation of the lower developed countries. But for example through the globalization the EU-Agricultural-Subventions do haven an impact on the chances to improve their situation. | **One main critical point is the part with “herefore the globalisation process did not narrow any of the countries‘ chances to improve their situation”. As I understand your essay in total you plead for a more pragmatic, differentiating discussion about the risks of globalization. From my point of view in this part you did almost the same mistake: Of course you cannot say that the “bad, bad globalization” is responsible in total for the situation of the lower developed countries. But for example through the globalization the EU-Agricultural-Subventions do haven an impact on the chances to improve their situation. | ||
'''Definitely true. But we need to consider that the EU is, as far as I can see, not the result of the globalisation process. I thought of this in the beginning, too (You might noticed my deep reluctance concerning the EU politics). However, we should keep in mind that protectionism is not a result of globalisation but of the chance for economic growth.''' | |||
**And last but not least another aspect would be very interesting in your essay: The relation between concerns and risks. That the globalization is not driven only by rational strengths. For example in the financial sector psychology plays a huge role. Therefore in some cases irrational concerns could turn into actual risks and get a real impact on the globalization. | **And last but not least another aspect would be very interesting in your essay: The relation between concerns and risks. That the globalization is not driven only by rational strengths. For example in the financial sector psychology plays a huge role. Therefore in some cases irrational concerns could turn into actual risks and get a real impact on the globalization. | ||